…They…Want….You! ….IN THE NAVY!!!! bamm…ba bammm…
Yep, it’s my first Fleet Week in Manhattan. I’m sure you all know about it – the annual ritual where the U.S. Navy unleashes thousands of Navy seamen (heh heh) and Marines into the city…..for the explicit purpose of getting laid. Correct me if I’m wrong. But everyone I’ve asked confirms that theory for me. So thousands of NY girls (and Jersey girls – you know they’re always gonna be there, damn Jersey) pretty themselves up (read: look like a whore) and get ready to bag the first handsome sailor that so much as walks within a city/avenue block of them.
But here’s the problem:
Most of the Navy is fat. Just saying. I remember this from when I’d stay with my Dad and Pat down at Roosevelt Roads NAS in Puerto Rico. You think the SNCOs in the Air Force are bad? P’shaw! Now of course that’s a blanket stereotype I’m applying, because like all the services, there are plenty of ridiculously good-looking people with perfect bodies who WORK that uniform. It’s just that the very very large (pun intended) majority of the services is filled with average to overweight folks. Who don’t look all that great in a uniform. So seeing a lot of the white Navy uniforms around town, I had to chuckle to myself when i saw some of the bigger boys. And yes, I am a jerk and I do think I’m better than everyone else (because I know someone out there is wondering Who the Hell does Hobie think HE is?). LOL. But of course the Marines are another story. I don’t think you can be a fat Marine. It’s kind of impossible. And that shows.
So that was my observation on my way home from work, which in itself was a roundabout journey because I went down to Union Square after work to go to the New York Costumes store. It’s a ridiculously stocked store of every costume and accessory you can imagine. For my Colorado Springs peeps, it’s like Zizo’s, but even bigger. Seriously. I had to pick out some accessories for my Village Person outfit – I’m going to be the Construction Worker, so I had to get appropriate headgear and….mustache! Awww yeah. If I have courage, I’ll post some of the inevitable pics from the party when they’re inevitably taken. It’s gonna rock. And I won’t care, because I plan on being RIDICULOUSLY drunk by that point. WoOOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!
LOL – this weekend is going to be awesome.
But even before the weekend – I’m going on a date on Thursday night. Hells yeah!
2 replies on “They…Want….You!”
So wait…instead of Fleet Week being full of buff and hot sailors, like in that episode of Sex and the City, it’s really full of fat dudes who had to use a pound of Crisco to squeeze into their uniforms?
My dream has been shattered. 🙁
Also, excellent choice with the construction worker, he’s the best one.
See? He’s all “GRRRR, CHECK OUT THIS AWESOME SCREWDRIVER I HAVE IN MY TEETHS!!”
First, there are plenty of the hawts is uniform – but c’mon, former Sgt Jenny, you know that for every hotness in Uniform, there are 10 that aren’t. I have a feeling the super hawts already got scooped up the second they stepped off the boat. The rest were left to wander around Times Square aimlessly, which is where I saw them.
And awesome pic there. Who knew I needed to have a screwdriver? Now, I do! Got the hardhat and aviators and mustache – I am soooo ready. Plus I found out that some of my friends out there, KD and Susan, may come as Cop and Indian. Hells yeah!